The Discipleship Dilemma – Why We Don’t Change
Many Christians genuinely want to become more like Jesus.
We pray. We read. We attend church. We listen to sermons, podcasts, and teachings. We gather information, collect insights, and learn new ideas. Yet many of us quietly carry the same question:
Why am I still the same person? Why do I continue to struggle with the same fears, habits, reactions, and patterns? Why does lasting transformation seem so difficult, even when my intentions are sincere?
This question sits at the center of what we call the Discipleship Dilemma.
The dilemma is simple. We have been taught to point outwards, always looking to Jesus, to God, but never to ourselves. In fact, if we become curious about our inner life, our story, we may feel guilty or selfish.
Season 2 explores a forgotten reality of spiritual formation and introduces one of Soil & Roots’ foundational ideas: Double Knowledge.
For centuries, Christian thinkers have observed that the journey toward God and the journey toward self are deeply connected. We cannot truly know God without learning to see ourselves honestly, and we cannot understand ourselves without encountering God.
Yet this journey into self-knowledge is often derided or condemned in our current age. What is there to discover in our hearts?
Many of the forces shaping our lives operate beneath the level of conscious awareness. Hidden assumptions, unconscious desires, emotional wounds, personal histories, and deeply ingrained habits quietly influence how we relate to God, others, and ourselves.
If we hope to become people of depth, we must learn to see beneath the surface.
To help us do this, Season 2 introduces the Heartview framework. Heartview is a practical way of understanding how our inner lives become visible through the patterns of our everyday lives. Our thoughts, emotions, behaviors, relationships, health, words, time, and money reveal what is happening within us. These indicators provide a window into the deeper realities that shape who we are becoming.
Throughout this season, we explore questions such as:
- Why do people struggle to change?
- How are human beings actually formed?
- What role do thoughts, emotions, and desires play in discipleship?
- Why is self-awareness essential to spiritual growth?
- How can we learn to see what is happening beneath the surface of our lives?
The goal is not self-improvement. The goal is transformation.
The Christian life is not simply about managing behavior or acquiring information. It is about becoming the kind of person who increasingly reflects the character and life of Jesus.
This season invites us to look honestly at ourselves, not as an act of self-absorption, but as an act of discipleship. Because the journey toward God always includes the journey toward self.
Welcome to Season 2.
Key Themes
- Double Knowledge
- The Discipleship Dilemma
- Heartview
- Self-Awareness
- Self-Knowledge
- Spiritual Formation
- Human Flourishing
Featured Episodes
Ep 14: Uncovering Our Hidden Hearts
Ep 15: Thought Patterns Reveal Our Hearts
Ep 16: The Role of Emotions in Discipleship
Ep 17: (Bonus) The Bedrock of Deep Discipleship
Ep 18: Health as a Spiritual Indicator
Ep 19: Our Behaviors Reveal Our Hearts
Ep 20: Attachment Styles and Spiritual Formation
Ep 21: Words as Spiritual Indicators
Ep 22: Time and Spiritual Formation
Ep 23: Money as a Spiritual Indicator
Ep 24: The Importance of Double Knowledge
Ep 25: Arguments Against Double Knowledge
Continue the Journey

