How to Judge like Jesus
Written by Dr. Tim Boswell
Soil & Roots exists to encourage us to come together and help solve what theologian Dallas Willard called โThe Great Omission.โ Though we talk about making disciples, we struggle to do so.
If you donโt think The Great Omission is a problem, consider the number of denominations, sects, schisms, scandals, misbehavior, fears, anxieties, divorces, porn addictions, and nonsense that all too frequently come from modern Christianity and us.
For the first five seasons, we explored The Great Omission in great detail, including three other problems that drive the lack of genuine discipleship in the modern age.
One of the primary drivers of The Great Omission is a shocking lack of emphasis on the fact that the discipleship journey is about becoming more like Jesus from the inside out. Things like church attendance, doctrine, service, and evangelism are all good things, but ideally they flow from a heart that is intentionally growing to speak, act, relate, and love more like Jesus over time.
That premise raises an interesting question. If the point of our spiritual journey is to become more like Jesus, what is Jesus really like? Do we have a clear picture of the person we are supposed to emulate?
Here in Season 6, weโre exploring some perhaps unexpected traits of Jesus.
Weโve talked about his abiding relational security and connection to the Father. Weโve discussed his tendency to be confusing, mysterious, even cryptic. And weโve explored his relational discernment and shrewdness.
Today, weโre looking at another characteristic of Jesus: Jesus as judge.
The way we normally understand being judgmental, it isnโt exactly a trait that will win us any popularity contests. Now, maybe somebody has told you that they just love it when you judge them. Or maybe youโve heard that Christians in general really ought to be more judgy.
But I doubt it. Letโs dive in.
Illustration / Anecdote
If youโd like a frank assessment of your talent, one option is to go on a show that Simon Cowell judges. On American Idol, The X-Factor, or Britainโs Got Talent, Simon made a name for himself by the brutal and often witty ways he told contestants precisely what he thought.
He told one singer, โIf you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you.” To another, he said, โIt was a bit like ordering a hamburger and only getting the bun.” He advised one contestant, “Do you have a singing teacher? Get a lawyer and sue her.” And he told a lifeguard who came to audition as a singer, “If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning.” Ouch.
Or perhaps youโre a budding chef looking for honest feedback. Just participate in a show like Hellโs Kitchen or MasterChef, and Gordon Ramsay wonโt hesitate to share his thoughts. He told one aspiring chef, โThis fish is so raw, heโs still finding Nemo!โ To another, he said, โThereโs enough garlic in here to kill every vampire in Europe.โ He told one chef, โI wouldnโt trust you running a bath, let alone a restaurant.โ And to another, he said, โThis lamb is so undercooked, itโs following Mary to school!โ
Simon Cowell and Gordon Ramsay certainly have some strong opinions. Somewhat ironically, our culture strongly dislikes it when someone judges us, yet the ratings for these types of shows suggest we love it when others are judged.
A Culture of Judgment
Celebrity chefs and music critics arenโt the only ones sitting in the metaphorical judgment seat. We all constantly judge aspects of our culture. Itโs impossible not to. We have to make judgments every day to survive.
According to the dictionary, to โjudgeโ means to form a conclusion about something through careful weighing of evidence; to form an estimate or evaluation; or to hold an opinion, especially a negative opinion.
We have evaluations and opinions on many things. We judge new soda flavors. We judge the service we get at restaurants or the time it takes at a drive-through. We judge the decisions and actions of our neighbors, coworkers, family members, and friends.
In athletics, academics, and entertainment, judges evaluate every competition, from spelling bees to the Academy Awards to the Olympics. We have teachers and professors judging schoolwork assignments, and committees judging the Nobel Prize. Agents and publishers judge book submissions. Drill sergeants judge soldiers at boot camp, and higher officers judge military plans. And, of course, we have an actual judicial system with judges at lower courts, judges at high courts, and judges at the Supreme Court.
Studies show that people form judgments about another personโs trustworthiness, attractiveness, likeability, competence, and aggressiveness within a tenth of a second of meeting them.
A study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science found that a glance at a person’s face for as little as one-thirtieth of a second was sufficient to form a first impression. We often, literally and figuratively, judge a book by its cover.
From Judge Judy to Judge Dredd, judgment pervades all parts of our society. Itโs how we rank, categorize, and approve, and itโs also how we aim to administer fairness and justice, at least in theory. We critique and evaluate. We decide on good, better, and best. We determine right and wrong.
So, if judgment is such a pervasive part of our world, how are we as Christians meant to approach it? If weโre trying to be like Jesus, are we supposed to judge? Not to judge? Why is this so unclear, and why does judging get us in so much trouble?
Judging Others
Maybe judging the new Frosty flavor at Wendyโs isnโt what people have in mind when they accuse someone of being judgmental. We all judge, but thereโs a particular kind of judging that really tends to rock the boat: judging other peopleโs character, identity, or even choices.
In Western culture, some people believe there is no single, absolute truth or universal standard of right and wrong. This idea is known as moral relativism. While itโs very popular today, itโs also nonsensical.
From this perspective, itโs a simple step to say that nobody has the right to judge. They might even use a Bible verse to back it up: โDo not judge, so that you wonโt be judgedโ (Matthew 7:1).
But hereโs the thing: judgment is inescapable. We all judge. In fact, if you claim that judging another is wrong, youโve passed judgment on another.
And even moral relativists have a moral center. If you steal their car, theyโre still going to think itโs wrong. Nobody actually lives by moral relativism โ itโs impossible.
Everybody operates with some sort of moral center, but the question is whether the underlying ideas that inform our moral positions make sense, – do they align with Godโs ideas or not. Are our ideas about morality from the kingdom of light or the kingdom of darkness?
Our approach to judging and our response to being judged both stem from our ideas and desires, which sit in the bedrock of our hearts. These ideas typically go unexamined and unexplored โ weโve been discussing them for three years here at Soil & Roots. When we judge others and react to being judged, it often reveals the ideas our hearts are rooted in, whether weโre aware of them or not. This might be insecurity, a desire to be liked, a need to prove ourselves, or a thousand other things.
For example, if I receive an email from a supervisor who assesses my work performance and finds it lacking, and I have an emotional meltdown, something is going on beneath the surface.
If I passed up a family reunion to complete my work, then maybe I feel unappreciated. Maybe I feel injustice at this judgment, when Iโve been working my tail off for months to gain this supervisorโs approval of my work. Going deeper, it may reveal a deep-seated desire for validation. Perhaps I was raised in a family where I learned to be performance-driven and to try to please others. Perhaps my identity is intertwined with my work and receiving the stamp of approval, so this email, which judges my work, feels like itโs actually judging me and my worth as a person.
That is all hypothetical, but you get the idea. If we are hypersensitive to criticism, it shows a wound or insecurity in that area, which we can work to heal with the help of friends, self-examination, and the Lordโs guidance.
And if we are quick to judge others in a certain way, it can indicate a similar struggle, shortcoming, weakness, or prejudice in our own hearts, and we can work through it with the same level of transparency and openness to change.
The goal is for our hearts to be transformed to be like Christโs, and for our hidden ideas to be formed into his. This means we can and should learn to judge like He does.
Do Not Judge?
The most quoted Bible verse on judgment is the one I referenced: Matthew 7:1: โDo not judge, so that you wonโt be judged.โ
But as you read on, Jesus says, โFor you will be judged by the same standard with which you judge others, and you will be measured by the same measure you use. Why do you look at the speck in your brotherโs eye but donโt notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, โLet me take the speck out of your eye,โ and look, thereโs a log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First, take the log out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brotherโs eye.โ
First, Jesus begins with a seemingly blanket statement: โDo not judge.โ However, he then provides instructions on how to judge.
Paul Copan, in an article in the Apologetics Study Bible, writes:
How do we resolve the apparent tension? By taking note of the spirit in which we make judgments. Do we think weโre superior, which is the attitude Jesus condemned, or are we assessing actions or attitudes with a spirit of humility and concern, recognizing our own weaknesses? In Matthew 7:5, Jesus told us to examine ourselves first, and then we can help our brother or sister. So there is a problem to be dealt withโbut only after self-examination.
Looking Inward
We donโt typically link โjudgmentโ with โself-examination,โ but there is a clear progression here. We are to help our brother remove the splinter in his eye, but only after we remove the log in our own. The Bible doesnโt say to leave both pieces of wood where they are. The goal is not for each of us to insist that we are right, to agree to disagree, and to part ways with nothing fundamentally changed. The goal is to remove both obstructions so we can see clearly.
Here again, we find the idea of being authentic with ourselves and with others โ something that many struggle with because we would rather present our false selves.
Imagine you go to an optometrist to have your eyes examined, but the eye doctor comes out with a blindfold on. Youโd be pretty skeptical of her ability to evaluate your eyes. An eye doctor needs to see clearly so that you can see clearly.
Weโve been talking about โdiscernmentโ lately, as with Jesusโs remarkable relational discernment. Discernment requires clear sight. It involves incredible perception, an ability to see beyond the surface, starting with ourselves.
Season 2 covered this in detail โ the concept of heartview. As a quick recap, heartview is the practice of paying attention to the signals the heart gives through our eight indicators. These eight indicators are: thoughts, emotions, health, actions, relationships, words, and how we use time and money.
Each of these indicators reveals whatโs going on in our hearts, provided we accept Jesusโ invitation to explore our true ideas and desires, as well as our stories, with trusted friends. We sometimes call it โminingโ for our own desires and ideas, in the sense of digging deep until the truth, a kind of treasure, is foundโฆ possibly far below the surface.
Many people donโt know their hearts very well, and we donโt often receive encouragement to dig into their depths.
Modern Christianity might give us phrases like โjust give it to Godโ or โnail it to the cross,โ but is less likely to give us permission or guidance for the long, messy, complicated work of digging into our stories, our wounds, and our hearts to bring to light the ideas that are at work there. Only when we do this can we discover what we truly believe about ourselves, what we truly believe about God, and whether our ideas align with Godโs ideas.
Paul Copan goes on to say, โThe wrong kind of judging is condemning. The right kind of judging is properly evaluating moral or doctrinal matters with a humble, helpful attitude. We should treat others the way we would want to be treated, thinking, Thereโbut for the grace of Godโgo I.โ
Humility comes more naturally when we take the time to truly explore our own hearts. None of us will find perfection there. We all carry wounds, hurts, and sorrows.
When we honestly examine our true ideas and desires, we realize how much we depend on the grace of God.
When Heartview is an ongoing practice and habit, a regular part of our lives and our apprenticeship with Jesus, we will develop a spirit of humility and compassion for others. Then, when we see a brother or sister in need of help or correction, we are more likely to act as Jesus would, trusting the Holy Spirit for guidance and following Christโs example. In some cases, this may mean a rebuke. But in most situations, it means gentleness, kindness, and thoughtfulness.
How Then Should We Judge?
The folks over at the Bible Project have some great resources on this topic. In their podcast episode from July 29, 2024, titled โIs There Ever a Time to Judge Others?โ, Jon Collins and Tim Mackie note that Jesus begins with the command not to judge, but then turns around and says how we should judge, but only in certain ways and circumstances. There is nuance and complexity.
Jon and Tim note we may well get it wrong if we try to determine someone elseโs motives, when we likely struggle to even determine our own. We think we are evaluating other peopleโs behavior in a fair, equitable, unbiased way. But what if we turned it around and used the same measure on our own behavior? Are we treating others with the kindness and generosity we use to evaluate ourselves?
They point out: โJesus cares very much about right relationships. He also is very tolerant of ambiguity and of the mixed nature of the human heart and therefore the mixed nature of his community of disciples. He was kind to Judas until the very end. He never treated him unkindly, even when he knew.โ
Dallas Willardโs The Divine Conspiracy is also helpful here. Willard writes:
โIf we would really help those close to us and dear, and if we would learn to live together with our family and โneighborsโ in the power of the kingdom, we must abandon the deeply rooted human practice of condemning and blaming.โ
Willard observes that people do sometimes need correction, but that we can evaluate and act without condemnation or the contempt and anger that so often accompany it, which bring feelings of rejection, shame, and retaliation.
Judging According to the Heart
As I noted at the start, judgment is all around us and a necessary part of life. You canโt function in society without it. We must all judge the words and actions of the people around usโnot just our neighbors and coworkers, but also our family members, friends, and leaders in government and elsewhere. We have to make decisions for the good of ourselves, those we care for, and the Kingdom itself. We are obligated to judge and act accordingly.
How attuned are we to God, to ourselves, and to the hearts of others as we judge?
Jesus was constantly making judgments according to the heart. He was perfectly attuned to his own heart, to the heart of the Father, and to the hearts of those around him. To be like him, we put in the effort to mine our own ideas through heartview and ensure they align with Godโs ideas.
We learn to listen, truly listen, to what others’ hearts are revealing through their heartview indicators. And we ask ourselves, are we truly putting others first even as we judge them? Are we acting for their own good and our own good?
We therefore judge with righteous judgment, not based on appearances. We look beyond the surface. We use discernment, shrewdness, and attunement to hearts to judge according to the heart.
My friend Tim, or Doc as we call him around here, shares this:
โOne of the hardest parts of parenting a teenager has been helping him to judge right or wrong, safe or not safe, good or bad. Things seem black and white as a kid, but as you become an adult, the world is all kinds of grey. When our oldest son knows other teens facing abuse or trauma, or with allegations against them, or issues with harmful substances, how to judge? How to best serve himself and them? Should he cut ties or be salt and light? Who to believe? Which side to take? And my wife and I have to judge and take action as parents for our childโs well-being and formationโwe cannot simply throw up our hands and tell him to do whatever he wants and everyone else can, too, because weโre not going to judge. So we are trying to train our son to look below the surface and to be attuned to his own heart and the hearts of others. It requires patience. It requires discernment. And it requires compassion, to treat others as we would hope to be treated ourselves.โ
Wrap-up
In the real world, we canโt escape judgment. We will all be judged, and we all judge others.
As we judge others, we should guard against condemnation and contempt. This is judgment with an attitude of superiority and anger that leads to rejection, shame, and retaliation from the person being judged. Judging can be damaging and harmful. It can distance people from God rather than draw them nearer. It can drive a wedge or close doors.
We examine our hearts and ensure we are judging with the right motives, for their own good and for ours. The right kind of judging is actually a very loving thing to do.
We practice heart listening. We consider our relationship with the other person and look carefully at the context and circumstances. We demonstrate relational discernment and compassion by putting ourselves in the other personโs shoes and seeing the situation from their perspective.
We ask ourselves, do we just want to prove ourselves right? Or are we trying to protect ourselves or someone we love? Are we trying to build the right relationship that will bring someone closer to Jesus?
Meanwhile, are we digging up and exposing the false ideas in our soil? Are we basing our action on ideas of the Kingdom? Are we learning from the Master and apprenticing with him in all things?
Logs can build homes to shelter us, fires to warm us, and bridges to connect us. But we have to take them out of our eyes first.
